Observations of a Quixotic Femme Noire __One Percent - 1%__ Warrior-woman; a Valkyrie. I'll always be yours. Always...and never.



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DEAR ABBY: My husband and I expect our first child in three months. His mother is already pressuring us to let her baby-sit, and eventually have the child for summers and vacations. The problem is, her negligence and poor judgment while raising her own children led to them both being physically and sexually abused. She continues to be friendly with anyone who will be friendly with her, including the family members who abused her children.
There is no way I'll ever let her be alone with my child. My husband supports my feelings. But we don't know how to tell her that her services are not needed or wanted without causing hurt feelings. -- SETTING LIMITS IN WISCONSIN
DEAR SETTING LIMITS: When she asks to baby-sit, tell her nicely that you already have made other arrangements. Ditto for extended vacations. Explain that she's welcome to visit when it's convenient for all of you. However, if she insists on knowing why she can't take the baby, repeat exactly what you have told me. Your child's safety is more important than your mother-in-law maintaining the fantasy that her children's upbringing was normal.
holla@me posted by MobiusRazor at 09:19