Girl With The Curls |
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Observations of a Quixotic Femme Noire
__One Percent - 1%__
Warrior-woman; a Valkyrie. I'll always be yours. Always...and never. ![]() Are You HOT or NOT? ![]() ![]() ARCHIVES 04.2001 05.2001 06.2001 07.2001 08.2001 09.2001 10.2001 11.2001 12.2001 01.2002 03.2002 04.2002 05.2002 06.2002 07.2002 08.2002 09.2002 11.2002 01.2003 03.2003 04.2003 05.2003 08.2003 03.2004 04.2004 05.2004 07.2004 11.2004 12.2004 01.2005 02.2005 03.2005 04.2005 05.2005 06.2005 07.2005 08.2005 09.2005 10.2005 11.2005 12.2005 01.2006 02.2006 04.2006 05.2006 10.2006 11.2006 01.2007 02.2007 06.2007 07.2007 08.2007 11.2007 12.2007 05.2008 09.2008 10.2008 11.2008 |
Thursday, January 20, 2005
"We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations." - Anais Nin
"Chaos and order are not enemies, only opposites." - Richard Garriott "Chaos often breeds life, when order breeds habit." - Henry B. Adams "I have a great belief in the fact that whenever there is chaos, it creates wonderful thinking." - Septima Poinsette Clark "Music creates order out of chaos..." - Yehudi Menuhin Don't Wait Too Long - Madeline Peyroux You can cry a million tears You can wait a million years If you think that time will change your ways Don't wait too long When your morning turns to night Who'll be loving you by candlelight If you think that time will change your ways Don't wait too long Maybe I got a lot to learn Time can slip away Sometimes you got to lose it all Before you find your way Take a chance, play your part Make romance, it might brake your heart But if you think that time will change your ways Don't wait too long It may rain, it may shine Love will age like fine red wine But if you think that time will change your ways Don't wait too long Maybe you and I got a lot to learn Don't waist another day Maybe you got to lose it all Before you find your way Take a chance, play your part Make romance, it might brake your heart But if you think that time will change your ways Don't wait too long Don't wait Hmm... Don't wait Don't You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds I'll be alone, dancing, you know it baby... Weekend In New England - Barry Manilow All My Life - DJ Harry; Collision Sleeps With Butterflies - Tori Amos; Beekeeper Daily Overview for January 19, 2005 by Astrology.com Taurus Quickie:Don't jump the gun. Gather information and sources. Then make your move. Yesterday, I was taking a shower and while washing, I noticed a nickel sized lump on the underside of my left breast. As soon as I touched it, my hand flew away from it. Then I started laughing. I went to my doctor this morning and of course, nothing can be said without further tests. It is 2cm in diameter, about a nickel. The doctor told me that because it is a moving mass, I shouldn't worry too much. That made me chuckle. I mean, yes worry, but not TOO much. I told Dude. He's all like, you're fine. I'm nervous. I don't have a big life insurance policy. I will be absolutely worthless to my family in death. Dude would have to carry everything...temporarily alone and stressed. And we certainly don't want to have him rely on my parents with our kids ever again. I told my bestest friend about it and she told me not to think much into it yet...not until I get some real results. I told her that she should know me by now; I think about the Nth level so's I can get my shit together. She just laughed at me saying that I have my shit together more than anyone she knows. "Well," I said, "you know that I can't have the house a wreck before I check out." She told me to shut the fuck up as she laughed her ass off. I know, premature, but like I said, I like to make sure everything's in order...to make things easier for myself and those I care about the most. Why did my mother tell my daughter that she is too thin and needs to eat more? Bren then asked if he was ok. I was hyper-pissed! I told both of them that they are fine and that as long as they eat mostly whole foods and play. I gave them a mini nutrition lesson on whole and processed foods. Gramma just started working on her own weight and health issues at 52. When I was a kid, she said the same thing to me as she said to Guin and then turned around asking me a few years later if I wanted to look like her. She's always had problems with her weight; put me in the clean plate club and applauded my efforts of almost becoming anorexic when I was a teenager. She ended up in the hospital herself for anorexia when she was a teenager. She has no business telling anyone about healthy eating. I've worked most of my life throwing her issues off myself. I'll be damned if that fuckin' bitch is going to put any stigmas on my children. She and my father stuff Bren with 2 14" pizzas a day when he spends the night over their house and then scoff at me when his doctor and myself notice he's getting over-weight. They sneak him food! Then to tell my girl that she's too thin. That's fucked-up. I'm so tired of their shit. They also told Bren that "big boys don't cry." I threw a fuckin' fit about that. Explained to Bren that everyone cries; happy, sad, funny, love, etc. Crying isn't bad or good. It is an expression of emotion. I don't want to cease visitation because it will seem as if I'm doing it because of my problems with my folks. Bren and Guin will learn all on their own how toxic my parents are. But I think that I may have to impose supervised visitation. My parents trying to "teach" my children a sense of self, when they don't even sense themselves? No way! I'm just rambling now...fuck it. It's important to have a Sense of Self: I Think / Feel / Value...whatever/whomever. Interaction with people, creatures, etc. isn't always about relating...it is about empathy. holla@me
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